Consistent Uncertainties

Never underestimate your power to heal with a kind smile or hurt with a simple word.

When Will It End?


Imagine a person who thinks that they can do no wrong; that the general rules of life, love, conscience and legality do not apply to them. Add to that parents, family members and friends who allow all this to go on. You have a impenetrable fortress built around this person. What lengths does the average person have to resort to in order to discover the true nature of the beast. For good people caught in this unseemly and undesirable spot; we cannot even fathom the layers of deceit needed to keep up the charade day after day, or year after year.

Lets peel back the layers for a moment. In my experience, many of those layers I was unfortunately unaware of due to the furtive nature of those persons keeping up the guard. However, there were some instances, that I managed to track down some truthful answers about the situation. It was only due to my tenacity and strong beliefs that led me to investigate things as they arose. How much damage is done to a person’s self-worth by this time. My answer to that would be “a lot”. To resort to following, spying and sneaking around just to get simple truths is degrading to say the least. But necessity has and always will be the mother of invention. It’s unfortunate when one has to stoop to these levels in order to get honesty out of a relationship.

So what then of the people who allow this person to rule their lives. I’m speaking now of the parties that give this perpetrator full rein in their fantasy land. Does it not take its toll on them as well? I would certainly hope so, that is, if they proclaim themselves to be law-abiding and honest citizens. When does it end? Does it begin slowly unraveling when they happen to give the wrong person the wrong answer. Who could possibly tell the players without the score cards? Or is it simply a case of they don’t volunteer too much in the way of information. I suppose it’s safer that way. Worse yet, does it end when the person that they’re covering for goes too far and hurts or kills someone? Many questions, of which there are many convoluted aspects. Too many for the rational person to absorb fully.

Now for a moment consider a child growing up with these persons who are so willing to deceive for the sake of this harmful individual. Would this child be safe? There are so many variables, it makes one dizzy. With family members around who project the image; probably the child would be safe on a physical level. But…..what about the psychological impact that this kind of mind-bending, life-altering way of living has on a young, impressionable mind? As a parent,  I keep coming back to this in my mind.

I found this quote one night when I was cruising around on the web; thought I’d share it with you. It’s simple and to the point.

Conscience is the window of our spirit, evil is the curtain — Doug Horton

Conscience is the instilled belief system of what is right or wrong. It’s an inner sense that impels us to follow in a right and good direction. What happens when there is no conscience? If we were to explore this quotation a little further; I think we could see that the loss of conscience would allow evil to prevail. The ability to hide all these terrible things from people who have a right to know becomes the curtain that allows evil to plant a seed and flourish.

I’m going to get down off my soapbox now; my evening rant has concluded. I guess for one to feel as vehemently as I do, one must go through it. As in many things in life; we must experience things for ourselves before we truly appreciate where the other person is coming from. There is one wish I  would pass along to you; that you will personally never know this firsthand.


3 thoughts on “When Will It End?

  1. The problem a spouse of a deceitful partner faces when they want to expose the truth to their children or the new lover is that it is turned back on them saying, ” She/he needs to move on, they are making up stories to get back at me through you, can you not see that, and so on.

    It is a hard place to be if there are no legal convictions against the partner and they have the gift of the gab, they can convince anyone or at least make them doubts the facts and your intentions.

  2. You are right most people close to the person they love, be it a father/mother, son/daughter, husband/wife or lover, have a hard time accepting the truth. It is easier to blame someone else. That’s the reason so many scum bags get away with it.

    • You have a comfort level with the perpetrator but the other person is a complete unknown. Who are you going to give the benefit of the doubt to? Someone you just came into contact with or the person you have had a long relationship with? The human element will usually err on the side of caution and in this case it would be the person that you have experienced more of life with that you would be inclined (perhaps wrongly) to support.

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