How do we define ourselves in our lifetime? Is it what we have accomplished or the people we impact along the way? Probably it will be a mix of the two variables. What makes our lives important? As for my opinion, I believe the legacy we leave behind is not our worldly goods; it is how you have led your life while carrying on your daily, sometimes mundane, existence. How you treat people and handle situations each day….that, I think, is the legacy that each of us leave behind.
A few months ago, while at a relative’s funeral, it hit me like a ton of bricks. I’ve always believed that your legacy in life is the memories that others hold about you…..good or bad. I was overcome with emotions of disbelief that a man who had contributed to the community so selflessly could be gone in an instant. This gentleman was so many things to so many people. He was an actively involved father to his three children, a devoted spouse who loved spending time with his wife and family, was a council member, a volunteer firefighter and still had time to actively get involved with his children’s sport interests. Simply put, he adored his family and he delighted in all community minded events. I was fortunate to come from a family where my father shared all of these characteristics as well. It’s not that I’m not grateful for all the devotion that this type of family environment brings….this is NOT about that.
The kicker of it all; the thing that really blows me away….completely…is that there are amazing guys like this out there in the world. And then you have guys like my ex…..a total and complete waste of skin. Unfortunate….but true. What kind of legacy do they leave behind when they’re gone? The men who are so busy trying to grab the brass ring by climbing on the backs of innocent people and trampling them in the process. Too busy to make time for their children and spend their remaining years blaming others for their own shortcomings as a parent. Losing not days, but precious years in the lives of their children who suffer from the constant heartache of loss and abandonment. Lying and cheating to get what they perceive is their “god given” right. Not earning it the way that many others do? No, that’s not in their scope for they honestly believe that this mundane task is beneath them. They would prefer to gain it the easiest way possible. Their goal? Who knows? Not me. I don’t get it!
I couldn’t live with myself if I carried on like that. Being a compassionate human being, I find it intolerable that someone would use others so obviously for their own selfish purposes.
For me, the most basic guide is my rule of thumb. If I can put my head on my pillow at night and know that I did my best that day then I can go to sleep easily knowing that. But what if there isn’t a conscience in place or at least a shadow of a conscience? Sleep comes easy to the untroubled mind. No conscience = untroubled mind. So I guess after all these years, my credo is flawed and I need to re-think it. Or maybe I’ll just carry on…..hoping that all the clichés that I’ve heard over the years of my life are true. “What goes around, comes around” and “all good things to those who wait” spring quickly to mind. I guess I’ll just do my own thing as I bump along the road of life. Aside from some relatively major blips in the radar over the years; life has been good to my family.
Coming soon! http://www.cheateralert.com
Working toward a better future!