Random snippets of real life drama with an ex-husband who lived to lie and cheat and cover his tracks and situations where he financially, emotionally and physically abused. As in many things in life, the truth was buried…buried deep within the layers of the infamous cheater who we will call Onion Boy (O.B. for short). We will strip away the layers for all to see the loser is not the victim but the man who believes he can lie so well that he will never be caught…
During the Onion Boy days; the time spent as a family was few and far between. On one of these rare occasions, my mother, father and brother-in-law were in town to claim a vehicle that they’d won in a draw. Knowing that their onion boy son-in-law knew the downtown area very well, they had asked him to come along for the drive. It gave them the opportunity to visit (as they didn’t see him very frequently these days – because he “worked” so much) and he could help them find their destination. Keep in mind this was long before computers and gps systems. He obliged them, I am happy to report. It wasn’t until years later and several things came to light that I wondered if perhaps there wasn’t a hidden agenda for him. Perhaps he was hoping that they would give him the extra vehicle as it was a van-style vehicle and not an ideal transport vehicle for a couple who were semi-retired. Nonetheless, at the time, I was pleased to see him make the time for them during that visit.
Not knowing that that particular day came with a price and conditions attached; we waited until they arrived back at the house with the new vehicle. As I looked out the front window of the house; I noticed a blue car that I had become quite accustomed to seeing. It was the other woman, waiting at the curb. The vehicles pulled into the driveway from their designated errand downtown. Of all the horrors. The only thing I thought of was preserving the last vestiges of whatever shred of decency that my parents held for onion-boy, When you spend so much time and energy, as I had, preserving this. I was horrified to see it all awash in a blink of an eye. I hurriedly opened the door of the house and greeted my father as best I could under the circumstances. Trying to appear happy and carefree while under the gun was something I’ve never been good at. Frankly, my feelings are generally worn on my sleeve. Deception is not my forte; but they were for Onion Boy. Thankfully, my mother was not at the door; she would have seen through my false happiness in a heartbeat.
My ex, the father of my child, at that time – I thought, the love of my life, stormed toward the blue car. Seeing the woman emerge from the driver’s seat, I feared the worst…as I had seldom seen him so angry. He grabbed the woman by her hair and threw her across the driver’s seat and into the passenger side of her vehicle. With that, he got into the car and sped off, leaving me to make yet another excuse. As I stammered through my shock and dismay; I uttered a half-hearted excuse to those that queried where he had gone. The calls to his cellphone went unanswered for hours…leaving me in a terrified state. In hindsight, there are many things that I would change. Why I didn’t call the police is one of them and still troubles me. Is is the fact that I was in shock or was I simply relieved that he had taken care of what could have been a potentially ugly situation with my parents. I fear the latter. Perhaps, I lacked the backbone or the self-confidence to stand up to the man who part of me feared. There are no words to express regrets of this nature. Simply that I must live with it as I must live with the memory of all of Onion Boy’s transgressions and deceit. Plainly and simply; one of us has got to have a conscience and it sure as hell was NOT Onion Boy….Welcome to my life with Onion Boy. What a great guy. Lied, cheated, stole and now I realized something even more sinister but I felt powerless to stop it.
….good ol’ O.B. Whenever there’s a lie, he’s never far away. The truth is a delicate seed that if not given light will never grow to the surface.