What happens when east meets west; when the polar opposites with so much in common meet on common ground. One might expect sparks to fly and certainly they may have if not for the passage of time and the unanswered questions hanging in the balance. Such is the case in our story. The lives of two women dramatically damaged and intertwined by the fates. Welcoming a man into their lives who had no interest other than propelling himself and his self-image; who was interested only in his own gains. This blog is the fruition of this collision of the two worlds. One of the unfortunate women who on a chance encounter entered into a dangerous relationship with a man who professed an unequalled and undying love. While at the same time, he tormented her in every way possible. Financially, emotionally and physically. The second woman; a wife left in a pregnancy and abandoned to raise the child by herself. Living in a shadow of emotional abuse and threats; alone to try to buffet the storms of financial debt. These worlds did not collide so much as provide an answering call. The call that would once and for all answer the questions and put the lies in prospective. This blog is the culmination of our worlds meeting and joining in a common purpose. Cheatbuster meets Victoria! To say it has been enlightening would be the gravest of all understatements. A chance to have some honesty come forth from the years of deception, pain and chaos has been balm to calm the ghosts from the past. The lady who I was once led to believe was the enemy has now become a close and dear friend. Cheers to you and cheers to the both of us who have moved into a calmer, gentler phase of our life. We continue to share some of the crazy, wild stories. The difference now, is that we are able to laugh about how outrageous the lies were and commiserate on how naive we were. We have left the guilt and the unanswerable behind. It’s not ours to shoulder anymore!
Consistent Uncertainties
Never underestimate your power to heal with a kind smile or hurt with a simple word.
Consistent Uncertainties 
February 25, 2010 at 12:50 am
To say I was deeply touched by your last blog would be an understatement. They say out of bad and evil comes good. I always knew in my gut and believed that the ex wife (not knowing till much later his wife not an ex) was someone I had a bond with I cannot explain why, but a decade later when we did speak honestly, I knew my gut was right. Not only is she an articulate (as is documented by this blog) well rounded women who has brought up a wonderful daughter but is also compassionate and caring.
Together we have created a friendship that not many can understand as we were brought together by heartache, pain and deceit. What most do not realize is that is the PAST, our friendship is the future, created by our mutual respect and caring for each other in which our common EX and PAST has no place or thought.
It has brought me great joy and happiness in getting to know you, your ever so sweet daughter and caring talented partner. (He plays in a band that is amazing)
To a long lasting close bond and friendship and always being there for each other and our kids.
Love
Victoria
February 25, 2010 at 1:27 am
I would wager to say that 9 times out of 10 the wife who is being cheated on is a much nicer, more enlightened, and more loving and compassionate woman than the cheating husband portrayes her to be to the other woman. In this regard I have to feel sorry for the mistress because she is being so mislead and basically emotionally abused by the lies and convulted expression of feelings for her that is given by the man. However, I often wonder why mistresses (the other woman) doesn’t ask more questions, deeper questions, dig for truer understanding before jumping head first into a situation that can only end up in disaster! In the end everyone gets hurt…and…I shutter to say it, but this includes the man who cheated on his wife and misled a lover. I’m sure, for a lot of those men, there is an emptiness whether they admit it or not, guilt and shame that lives on in them forever. it’s a no win situation all the way around! I do like your blog. And, it sounds as though, while both you and the wife were hurt, you have both moved on to much more positive ways of life! Congrats on that!
March 15, 2010 at 7:41 am
Thanks for dropping by the blog. I’ve often wondered the same thing about asking the questions instead of just assuming. But then again, I did the same thing as well on my end in the earlier years. I guess I can see how that can happen. I think the biggest thing is the lack of communication. By that, I mean the lack of communication between the two injured parties, the mistress and the wife. If they were to meet without the perpetrator around, I wonder if they’d have the same self-assurance about taking them at their word. Just a thought. We have moved on thankfully and our mutual pain has evolved into a friendship…..go figure, lol. It’s good and right and as things turn out, we have much more in common than the mutal hurt this man dished out to us….thank you for posting a comment, your words are insightful and wise!
Victoria – took me a long time to get to this point but I’m glad we’re here now! We’re in a much better place now, you and I. 🙂